Wedding Couples Say "I Do" To Tzedakah

By JULIE CHIZEWER WEILL

"Intimacy puts us in touch with fragility, and the acceptance of fragility opens us up to intimacy." Those were some of the wise words that our rabbi, Dov Taylor, spoke to my husband and me under our wedding chuppah last year. It reminded us of our own vulnerability and that which others encounter because of poverty, illness, and hate. "But marriage is an act of tikkun, repair, for all that is broken in our world, in ourselves, in our relationships," Rabbi Taylor explained.

In the Jewish tradition, a wedding is a simcha—a joyous event. But even during our happiest moments, our tradition teaches, it is necessary to remember the sorrow that plagues our world, and those who struggle in it. The breaking of the glass during the marriage ceremony is a symbolic act that recalls not just the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem, but also the despair in our present-day world.

Many wedding couples today are acknowledging the fragility of existence, our broken world, and their own blessings, by marking their unions with another act of repair—tzedakah. Derived from the Hebrew word tzedek, tzedakah means just or righteous giving. "This mitzvah mandates our active personal involvement in pursuing justice, by assuming responsibility for sharing wealth with those who are less fortunate than we are," says Marlene Provizer, Executive Director of the Jewish Fund for Justice.

With the launching of their Wedding Funds, JFJ now offers couples a unique and meaningful way to share the blessing of marriage and to begin to participate as a Jewish couple in the tradition of tzedakah. Through a JFJ Wedding Fund, set up by a wedding couple or by a wedding guest(s) in their honor, the wedding couple can support organizations that combat the causes and consequences of poverty in America.

Since 1984, the Jewish Fund for Justice, a national, publicly-supported foundation, has been a vehicle for Jews to express their historic commitment to the values of tzedakah and tikkun olam. JFJ has awarded a cumulative total of $6.6 million in grants to grassroots organizations around the country that assist immigrants and refugees, improve neighborhoods and build affordable housing, fight the devastation of drugs and crime, broaden opportunities for disadvantaged youth, and develop jobs and local economies. JFJ also works to increase Jewish understanding of and involvement in social and economic justice issues. It is the only national Jewish foundation with the sole mission of fighting for economic justice in America.

A JFJ Wedding Fund can be established with a minimum of $1500, contributed by wedding guests, by the wedding couple, or by a combination of the two. As Wedding Fund honorees, the couple has the opportunity to direct its tzedakah money from the fund to organizations that have been carefully screened by the Jewish Fund for Justice, groups that are promoting economic justice in their community.

The idea for the Wedding Funds grew out of the success that JFJ had already experienced with its Youth Endowment Funds, which offer youth the opportunity to be involved in philanthropy. A YEF is usually established in a child's honor at the time of their Bar or Bat Mitzvah, and once a year the honoree designates the proceeds to go to groups that are empowering low-income youth to fight poverty in their neighborhoods. The concept easily translated to wedding couples. JFJ has just begun to publicize its Wedding Funds, and already several couples have signed up. This year they will make their first round of grants.

Some families have chosen to create a fund in honor of their child's, niece's or nephew's marriage, giving the honorees an experience in philanthropy. "The Wedding Fund is a great way to pass on the sense of responsibility and habit of tzedakah through the generations," says David Schimmel, who opened a fund for his daughter and son-in-law when they got married last year.

Says one groom, "When my aunt told us she established a fund in our honor, I was humbled. I wished I had thought of the idea myself. So for my wife and me, it is the catalyst that will make us sit down each year and talk about our philanthropy as a couple."

Once a year for three years, JFJ will send the couple descriptions of several worthy organizations, and they can elect to earmark one-third of their Fund plus any accrued interest to one of these groups. Alternatively, they may elect to direct their tzedakah to one of JFJ's six areas of grantmaking: Building Community, Economic Justice, Women in Poverty/Purim Fund, Assisting New Americans, Investing in Youth, or Jewish Social Justice Groups. Or the couple may choose to direct their funds to a specific community in which JFJ makes a significant number of grants, such as New York City, Boston, Washington, D.C., Los Angeles, Chicago, San Francisco, and Philadelphia.

One Wedding Fund participant reported, "When my husband and I began to talk about the ways in which we wanted our wedding to reflect our values, we thought about making sure any left-over food was brought to shelters and we wanted the flowers to be donated to nursing homes. Then we started to think about the financial gifts we anticipated, and we wanted to extend our values in that area as well. We did some research, found out about JFJ's Wedding Fund, and signed up! We can't wait to make our first grant."

The concept is particularly appealing to people who are not in need of traditional wedding gifts or to couples who may be on their second marriage. These are folks who may already have dishes, silverware, vases, and the like. Rather than registering for gifts they do not need, they have requested that their wedding guests make a contribution to their fund instead.

"This is a moment in life when we feel so strong and hopeful about our future," reflects another couple. "It is a perfect opportunity to do something positive and to support the efforts of others who are working to create strong and hopeful futures for themselves."

By establishing a JFJ Wedding Fund, a couple ensures that their marriage is truly an act of repair.

(For more information about JFJ's Wedding Funds, contact Beth Edelson, JFJ's Associate Director or Rena Schwarz, JFJ's Annual Campaign Director at (212) 213-2113.)